Baldur’s Gate 3 devs throw a bone to advocates of what would be the RPG’s weirdest romance option – by shaming us for not keeping her alive

One of the weirder community narratives in Baldur’s Gate 3 revolves around the inability to romance any of its goblins – and two years later, Larian has finally addressed that narrative with a bit of casual guilt-tripping.

In a thread on Twitter celebrating the comparatively few players who managed certain uncommon achievements, Larian noted that only 2.65% of Baldur’s Gate 3 adventurers “managed to rescue Sazza three times in one playthrough.” Sazza, you may recall, is first located in the Druid’s Grove, trapped in a cage and at the business end of a crossbow-wielding Tiefling. Help her out there, and you’ll be given two further opportunities to spare her life as the game progresses.

Apparently, however, very few players managed to keep Sazza alive through all three encounters – something Larian is a little surprised by. “With the way you keep asking about goblin romance,” it says, “we’d have expected more of you to rescue Sazza from all her predicaments, just saying.”

If you’re not sure exactly what that’s referring to, it’s likely linked to a viral Tiktok in which one player noted that despite the ability to partake in Baldur’s Gate 3’s most unhinged romance option or that Halsin scene, the goblin ladies that you find around Act One are “off the menu.” It’s the kind of thing I’m a little surprised to see Larian finally acknowledging in public, especially two full years after release, but here we are. At least the phrase “short stacks of pancakes” didn’t make it into an official Larian announcement.

I don’t know what’s worse – the 4,000 Baldur’s Gate 3 sicko who beat the RPG’s Honour Mode at level 1, or the 30,000 who did it with an objectively terrible build.